The Life and Times of a Tiny Snowman: A Documentary

The tiny snowman, Bobby Drake, was born, or created as most snowmen are, on Tuesday February 8, 2011.

He had golf tees for eyes and a mouth, a couple of twigs for his arms and a cap from a 2-liter bottle for a hat.

Bobby's task was an important one.  he stood vigil over the back porch and protected it from marauders of any sort.  He was wonderful at his job.  During his few days on duty there were no threats against the back porch.  He was not affected in the slightest by the coldest temperatures of the year, and it is said, though it may only be legend, that he never blinked.

But the life of a tiny snowman is ephemeral, and early in life, disaster struck...

During the late-afternoon on the day of his birth, Bobby lost an arm in a tragic solar incident.  Doomed to be forever maimed at the hands of the evil-if-you-are-a-snowman Sun, Bobby became deeply mired in melancholy.  It is said he considered launching himself from the ledge of the very porch he was set to guard.

Soon, however, the Sun relented its attack. It disappeared behind the horizon and remained hidden behind thick clouds for nearly 48 hours.  During second day of his life, Bobby was strengthened by an additional 4 inches of powdery snow.  It piled around his base and even atop his head it covered his hat.  The additional snow added to Bobby's fierceness and he guarded the porch with more vigor.

Wednesday night the temperature fell to 4.3°. Bobby Persevered

On Thursday, the temperatures remained in the 20s with the Sun hidden behind a thick bank of clouds.  He persevered.

On Thursday night the temperature fell to -4°. He persevered


On Friday, the evil sun once again made an appearance.  But Bobby's ally, low temperatures, protected him. The day's temperature never rose above 15 degrees and Bobby bravely guarded the porch.  Little did he know, this would be his last day on earth. Snowmen are not very good communicators and he asked no one what the next day would bring.


Saturday was a tragic day for the back porch.  The Sun once again made an appearance.  This time the sun was strengthened and quickly defeated Bobby's ally low temperatures.  As the temp soared, bobby's weaknesses were unveiled.  The first weakness that the sun conquered was that Bobby was made of snow.   Snow really stands no chance against the vastly superior foe that is the Sun.  Bobby's second weakness is that he was tiny.  A larger snowman may have survived the day with only some wounds.  Probably a lost limb or two, but the day would have been survivable.


By the time the Bobby could be observed again nothing remained except for a pile of golf tees and some snow.  The porch was left unprotected.  An unprotected porch allowed wild animals to roam free.

Bobby Drake the tiny snowman lived a brief but valiant life.  He deserves to be remembered by generations of snowmen to come

(BTW, The name Bobby Drake is totally clever if you are the right kind of nerd)