I kept looking for the joke here. Finally I found it. Here's a blog post about the D-now I participated in back in January.
I totally agree with this list, Except I would have found a place for the speeder bikes.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLmM87r1ft4]
Since the Daytona 500 is this weekend and since I am watching the qualifying races right now. I thought I would repost my open letter to NASCAR from this fall. Here is a link to the original in case you want to read the comments from that time. Otherwise it is exactly the same:
The NASCAR season ended Sunday, and I wasn’t watching. Partly because the race started at 3 and I have church at 5, but also because I wasn’t really all that interested. I’ve been a NASCAR fan since probably the second grade. It is the first sport I remember caring about and the first major sporting event I ever attended was a Bush race at Bristol. Lately I have lost interest to some degree. I am only a fan, I’m not an insider and I don’t work in sports, but I do love NASCAR and I would like to see it improve. So here are some suggestions in the form of an open letter.
I’ll start this letter by addressing the major problem with NASCAR. The season is too long. It begins in mid-February and it ended 11 days from Thanksgiving. That means that December and January are the only months without racing. This problem is not limited to NASCAR, it is a the problem with most professional sports, long seasons make for boring seasons. I’m especially talking to you MLB and NBA. Have any of you ever heard that absence makes the heart grow fonder, or to leave ‘em wanting more?
I have put some thought into what can be done about this problem of the 10 month season. Here is my suggestion. I only want to improve things.
NASCAR needs divisions. This actually solves 2 problems. First, it shortens the season. Second, it makes use of some of the tracks that could use a second race (or a first, such as Nashville, Northern Kentucky, or Rockingham) Here’s how I propose it to work. Divide the drivers by the previous year’s standings with a snaking order. (1st place in div A, 2nd & 3rd in div B, 4th & 5th in div A, etc.) Then both divisions (Petty & Earnhardt?) have quality drivers and regardless which event you attend, you can see stars, just not all of them. Make that a 20 race schedule in the divisions, then put the top 6 from each division into the chase and the top 20 into the races for the chase. This gives NASCAR more television revenue, more tracks get to sell tickets, more fans have opportunity to see races, and the season ends nearly 2 months earlier.
The only real problem I can think of with this plan is how to deal with the Brickyard or Daytona 500, but someone can figure it out. Maybe even in the comments.
The second suggestion is to put a variety of track types into the chase. Maybe nobody has pointed this out. But a team that makes the chase and is particularly good at the mile-and-a-half quad-oval has a decided advantage. How about a Pocono or Bristol in the chase? If you are going to race stupid road courses, make one of them be in the chase. If weather concerns create the current schedule, take my first suggestion. If the season ended in late September you could race in Watkins Glen, or Pike’s Peak for that matter. But in mid November you are pretty much stuck with Phoenix and Homestead.
If some other teams had a chance it would help as well. Of the 35 races this season, 30 were won by a Roush, Gibbs, or Hendrick team. If you went to divisions, and kept 35-40 teams per race, it would definitely give some other teams a chance to win some races.
Mix in some minorities. NASCAR is no longer a sport of good ol’ boys from the south, but it is lily white. With the exception of Montoya, there is nothing resembling a minority anywhere around the track. I don’t know how to fix that problem, but seriously the future is in jeopardy as long as it remains the way it is. America is more diverse and will become more so. If golf can have a non-white superstar, surely something that’s actually fun like driving fast can as well.
Don’t bow to the environmentalists…yet. The sound of a stock car is unmistakable, and if they switched to ethanol and sound whiny like Indy cars, it would lose some of the magic. (Maybe I’m showing my ignorance here, somebody can straighten me out in the comments. Feel free, as long as you can be respectful.) The day is coming when everyone will get around on some new fuel, but until then, let’s not have silent, hydrogen cars going around the track.
I really like NASCAR and want to see it continue to be great. These suggestions are just my 2 cents to improve it. The outlook is not all bad I took this quiz and got 100% so the sponsors are definitely getting their exposure.
Feel free to comment on this. I’d like to know my readers’ thoughts on this one. Do you think I’m way off base, or have better suggestions?
This weekend is our annual Senior Adult banquet. For the past few years we have played "Battle of the Generations" Here's how it works: We ask our youth questions that the senior adults would find easy and we ask our senior adults questions that the youth would find easy and see which group wins. (It's always the seniors)
This year I am officially out of creativity. So I would like your help. Here's how we will do this - You submit questions that fit the above description to the comments. If I use your question in my game, I will email you the finished product. You supply the creativity, I'll supply my powerpoint skillz.
Here are some sample questions from the past few years to give you an idea what I'm looking for:
Questions for seniors -
Master Chief is the main character in... a. A popular TV show b. A popular video game c. A popular movie
Identify Master Chief
Which of these people is not the star of their own reality show?
Youth Questions -
Marshall Matt Dillon is the main character in... a. A popular movie b. A popular television show c. A popular comic book
Identify Marshall Matt Dillon
Which of these did not have a sidekick?
I assume by now that everyone with an internet connection has seen this video of David after leaving the dentist all hopped up on gas or some sort of anesthesia. It was everywhere on the web last week and remixed about 1000 times [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txqiwrbYGrs]
And I hope you have all seen the Chad Vader series.
So here's the Chad Vader response to David after the dentist
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGTAnXqn9Jc]
Also, finally they have begun season 2 of Chad Vader
This story about high school dropout rates appeared in my local paper last week and it reminded me of something a friend said to me a while back. This post is going to explore my thoughts on his theory. His theory is that we should allow students to drop out of high school if they are not interested in being there because those students who do not want to be there are a tremendous drain on the entire system. After considering it, I think I'm on board with his way of thinking.
It seems to me that there are two types of students who are uninterested in school. First, there are the students for whom the concept of book-learning is just unbearably boring. They may be hard-working, with a love of working on the farm or maybe they love doing auto body work. They problem is not their work ethic or even intelligence, but the entire atmosphere of school.
Secondly, are those students who have no ambition or motivation in life to be anything. All they want to do is play video games or smoke weed. Why should they be forced to sit in classes? They obviously don't want to be there. A bigger consideration, however, is that they make it impossible for other students to learn and for teachers to teach because they are a tremendous distraction.
Politicians are always touting tech educations and trade schools, but those are not necessarily the answer. Lazy or unmotivated in a classroom is lazy or unmotivated in a metal shop. And motivated will be successful. If a kid knows that he loves doing construction at age 16, and he's good with a hammer and nail but hates English, why make him stay in school? Or if he or she is a great mechanic, or a great child-care provider, provided they can read and communicate on some level, there should be no reason they have to stay in school.
So, you ask, what becomes of those dropouts who are lazy, unmotivated, or have no ambition in life? The same thing that happens to them now it will just occur a couple of years earlier. They get by by sponging off of others. They continue to live with their parents, or whoever will take them in. Most likely they will wake up one day and say it's time to grow up. If they are motivated they will get a job and be successful.
How could this work? I think it would work pretty simply if we just dropped truancy laws. What would happen if a student only appeared in class 100 of the 180 school days? He or she would fail. What would happen If you only showed up 60% of the time for your job?
Obviously we must have a literate society. We cannot let students drop out before they learn to read, but have a look at text scores. Many students never learn to read beyond a 6th grade level anyway. Maybe this plan would necessitate some sort of free GED system for when these people finally wake up but they are too old to go back to school. Even that would be cheaper than working to force them to go to school and keeping other students from learning.
As always, I look forward to being ripped apart in the comments
If you only watch one Japaneese commercial for a gun powered alarm clock. This should be that commercial Wonder why I've never seen this before. Seems like an obvious project for a star Wars fan
24 weird pillows - really nothing else to say about that. Some of them are very cool
Wow - Best Buy sarcasm is mean and funny
What happens when a geek has way too much time on his hands? He calculates the real-world cost of the Death Star.
Funny [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AhUHPhjStcs]
I just can't even imagine that this is possible
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wkZYBJGaMk]
I sat down here at my computer with every intention of writing a post about this and this. But after reading the comments of both, I realize that there is nothing I can add to the conversation that hasn't been said. Also, whenever I wade (no pun intended) into the waters of posting about SBC or BSCNC controversies, I find myself very disappointed with the comments section and find that I spend a lot of time moderating. I may regret even posting this. I will say this one thing as my way of framing the debate:
The most common message I have heard from theological liberals is; "Can't we all just get along?"
One side of the current debate says; "Can't we work together even though we don't get along?"
I think this is a distinction without a difference.
So I'm reading through my RSS feeds this morning and I see a headline about the Christian heritage of Groundhog Day. It seemed like an interesting topic to me, so I clicked on it. You can read it here - Groundhog Day's Christian roots
Lo and behold, what should I see but the smiling face of my former history professor, Dr. Stephen Wilson. Dr. Wilson was my favorite professor during my college career. He is energetic, passionate for his students, and wacky. Please read his article, it's interesting, and I'll pretty much guarantee you learn something.
These are my favorites from Super Bowl XLIII. I watched them all, and ranked them here. Enjoy. (I didn't even consider the movie previews.)
#1 Bridgestone
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IV--ISqrMLs]
#2 Coke Zero
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i5k7FBj3WLQ]
#3 Denny's
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5OfMb90v4qg]
#4 Coke
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bSNCnyCUdk8]
#5 Pedigree
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xl0x3LlWIig]
I also enjoyed the singing baby e-trade commercial
It is no secret that I love Portal. I believe it is simply one of the most brilliantly designed and executed games I've ever played. So of course I geeked out over this set of Portal guns somebody made I also love a good rant periodically. This rant about a flight on Virgin airlines is both hilarious and well-written. Here's a choice quote:
No sane person would serve a desert with a tomato would they. Well answer me this Richard, what sort of animal would serve a desert with peas in
This is a silly pic
Easily the greatest hacker prank of all time
The Super Bowl is Sunday and these are some pretty interesting numbers about its production
I almost passed out laughing at this. It's truly hilarious. Be warned - it does have a swear.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUbsc_a-e3g]
This video is really neat, so neat that I can tolerate the terrible song.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_HXUhShhmY]
So do I. There will be a best web junk tomorrow
This is a short version of best web junk this week. Far Side reenactments I loved the far side, and this makes me miss it
This clip from Saturday Night Live is really well done and funny. Although honestly it could have been an 11th grade Spanish class
[vodpod id=ExternalVideo.773711&w=425&h=350&fv=]
Despite Ryan's overwhelming negativity, today I will present my third and final (at least for a while) post about Twitter. Oddly enough I have seen a half a dozen posts about it in the last week. I think this phenomenon is because actual celebrities are now beginning to use it. Today's post is about some of the many websites that use the Twitter apps for a multitude of purposes.
I'll start with Twitterholic which shows you the top twitterers of all. Even though President Obama hasn't twittered since the election he is #1. largely because his campaign promised to announce his running mate by twitter first, he has a 60% lead over #2 Kevin Rose, the founder of Digg.com.
According to twitterholic I am the third most popular twitterer in Fayetteville NC. Behind this guy and this lady.
Next up is twitter grader. It ranks twitterers using some fancy secret formula in order to judge your influence and power among the community. It is no surprise that the twitter elite turns out to be a bunch of tech bloggers, because currently twitter is mostly used by techies.
According to twitter grader, I have a grade of 83* and am #2 on the elite list for Fayetteville NC. Again I am behind this lady.
Then there is twittemperature. This one is supposed to judge the relevancy of what you twitter.
I have no idea how this one works because I have gone from smoking hot to freezing cold in just a couple of weeks. Currently I'm 13° F whatever that means
Then there is tweetscan. It allows you to type in a word and see all recent tweets containing that word. Give it a try, it's pretty neat. Type in Brian Regan, or Obama, or Macaroni, or explosion.
Here's a list of real and fake celebrities on twitter
Try out some of these tools and tell me your scores and ranks.
*Obviously that's 83 girth units
A while ago, I posted about the very useful tool that I believe Twitter to be. Obviously, based on the comments, most of you still don't get why it is worth a try, or how it is different from the other social networks. Let me see if I can address that with this post.
The real difference in Twitter and the other social networks like Facebook is that it is portable. There is a facebook mobile, meaning I can use it on my phone. But Twitter can be fully experienced from a non-internet phone that gets SMS. (If you don't have to pay for individual texts.) Although my favorite way to use twitter on my phone is using betwittered.com/m. Also, with a camera phone you can post pictures just like sending MMS.
Even on your computer, it is portable. If I use twhirl, I never even have to visit the twitter.com website and I still see all my friends' tweets and am able to post my own. As much as I love RSS, it is not two-way like twhirl.
Facebook, myspace et al, are all about your profile, Twitter is about the updates. In fact, you only get a very barebones profile on twitter. It is assumed that you know who you are following .
Twitter is a bit like an IM to multiple people all at once. So if I'm driving home, I can update people in NC and KY all at the same time. Everyone can know when I arrive and when I left. And all my followers who just don't ccare, they can disregard those twitters. We have all become very good at ignoring what we re not interested in. I'll prove it. Look at your inbox right now. You will see 3 categories of things there, stuff that gets immediately deleted because you don't care, stuff you are genuinely interested in that you will take the time to read, and stuff that you only have a mild interest in that you will glance over but give no real thought to. Your twitterfeed is like that.
There is one more twitter-related post coming. It will be tomorrow, then I'll try to get back to blogging about more substantive things like fishing.
Here's a great fail Almost all of these accidental maps are really fun
This site condron.us is an interesting way to view blogs. And this week is the first time I've ever seen it
You know you want to apply for the best job in the world. I'm pretty tempted.
Cut in line at Wal-mart go to jail
By far the funniest video I've seen in a long time is this. Enjoy [vodpod id=ExternalVideo.771288&w=425&h=350&fv=clip_id%3D2809991%26server%3Dvimeo.com%26autoplay%3D0%26fullscreen%3D1%26md5%3D0%26show_portrait%3D0%26show_title%3D0%26show_byline%3D0%26context%3Duser%3A759504%26context_id%3D%26force_embed%3D0%26multimoog%3D%26color%3D00ADEF]
I have been seeing the "What is G?" commercials for a couple of weeks. I knew they have a ton of athletes in them and that they don't name the product they are advertising. My guess was that they were commercials for Gatorade because of the sheer volume of athletes I couldn't think of another product they might be for. Clearly I was not the only one wondering what they are for because when I googled "what is G" I got this article.
I suppose that this method worked for gatorade, it made me curious enough to look it up, but why would a product want commercials that don't name the product and don't even give you a hint about what it may be about? I'm pretty much baffled by this and hope it doesn't become a trend.
Here is one of the commercials:
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4dm-OnmLXY]
I know I have been blogging less since the new year. It's not really a conscious decision, but writing a blog post is a lot of work and I have an inordinately busy first 6 weeks of the year. I'll be back to my regular pace, (2 posts a week plus web junk on Friday) soon. In the meantime. Feel free to write a guest post. Keep checking in. Thanks for reading
You may remember evolution of dance. You should. it's probably a top 10 all-time viral video. Now there's a sequel. Allow me to be one of the thousands of blogs to introduce it to you. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=inLBPVG8oEU]
Here's the original again, just to refresh your memory. (plus it's awesome)
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMH0bHeiRNg]
Mercifully, the collaborative story has ended. It was fun, but nothing really happened. We may try it again next year, maybe I'll have a larger readership and folks won't be afraid to comment. Here it is in its final form: William woke up on a train. It seemed like he was in a rut, but today was different. Leaving his hometown for the first time in months, he was excited about what the future had in store for him. He got ready for his day in the tiny train lavatory and opened his luggage.
Inside his luggage was a surprise, a note in handwriting he didn't recognize. He opened it and it read simply,
"Meet me in the diner car at 10."
“Crap,” he thought. “It’s already 11:30.” He crammed the note back into his bag and hurried to the diner car.
The car was empty save for a very old man who appeared to be leaning against the window in a deep sleep. William walked over to him and, after staring for a few seconds in confusion, pounded the table as hard as he could. The old man quickly sat up with a terrified gasp. “What’s your deal, sonny?!” he asked, catching his breath.
William pulled out the note and asked, “Did you write this?”
The old man said, “No, son. I never learnt to read or write.”
William, having already missed his mysterious meeting and nothing to do, offered to teach the old man.
The old man replied defiantly, “No sir, I ain’t never had the notion to learn to read, and I ain’t never gonna. Now, if ya ’scuse me, I was in the middle of a dream where my missus was bakin’ me an apple pie!”
William decided it was best to just let the old man be. He exited the diner car and made his way back to his room. When he arrived another note was awaiting him.
It read, "I was going to warn you. GET OFF THE TRAIN AS SOON AS POSSIBLE."
Before he finished reading the note, the door to his very small room opened, and a giant man in an unfamiliar uniform tackled him, put him in handcuffs with a gag in his mouth and made it very clear that if he tried to escape he would be sorry.
"That was much easier than I expected," said the man in the uniform in a thick accent that was unrecognizable to William as well. "When we arrive I expect you will be just as cooperative."
The man in the uniform was former New York Giants’ defensive end Michael Strahan. The “accent” was caused by a piece of peanut stuck in the giant gap between his front teeth.
The peanut’s having been lodged in there for years, the smell was unimaginable.
“Geez,” William said. “You should get that taken care of.” Of course, with the gag in his mouth, it came out, “Gov, yo shih gid da ta’engaruv.”
“What’s that, boy? Some kinda foreigner talk? Just keep your mouth shut ’til we arrive.”
It was dark by the time the train pulled into the station. William was tired and hungry, but he cooperated with Strahan and was guided into an old, dusty building. A Cambodian child who smelt of mothballs followed the two men, carrying William’s luggage.
Strahan, William, and the Cambodian kid began down a dark hallway. At the end of the hallway, Strahan led William into a room. Once inside, William realized that he had been taken to an illegal gambling facility. Strahan forced William to sit down. The Cambodian child left William’s bags behind him and headed over to a table in the corner for some Beenie Weenies and Big K cola.
William was forced to play poker for three and a half hours. Then he got drunk on cheap vodka and passed out.
When he woke up, he was back on a train. But he was wearing lady clothes.
“Whaaa?” he mumbled. Catching a whiff of his vodka/morning breath, he decided to brush his teeth. On his way to the bathroom, he noticed that several other men were waking up to find themselves in dresses and fancy pantsuits.
He turned to one of the men and said, "I thought all that Michael Strahan stuff was a dream. What happened to us?"
"Idunno." Said the man, "I just woke up, and I didn't even know they made dresses in this size." The man was way over 400 pounds.
Baffled by the mystery, William set out to find anything that he could make sense of. No one had any luggage, (only a small bag of toiletries) no one had any wallet or identifiables, and no one knew what was going on. He sat down and looked out at the passing scenery. As the train rolled through a small village he noticed that all the signs were in some foreign language. He didn't even recognize the characters in the alphabet.
"Where are we?" said a very timid voice from a seat behind him.
It appeared that the question was not to be answered for the scenery of the village faded behind them and what laid ahead only reflected the desolation of the situation. There was nothing beyond the window but snow and ice. Not a glimmer of mountain peaks on the horizon, nor a bird in the clear blue sky.
For some time, William stared out the window, reviewing the recent events in his mind…looking for clues to answer the questions running through his mind. It was absurd. Things like this simply did not happen.
William, now lost within himself, was shaken alert again by the change in speed. The train was now slowing to a stop. Curious as to the destination, William raced to the front of the car to see what he could.
On his way to the front of the car, he fell through a hole in the floor. Unable to call out for help because of the debilitating cold, he was terrified when the train started back up and rolled on without him. After a couple of minutes, he froze to death.
And that’s why you don’t leave your hometown.
Webhick, Roland, Geneva, Ryan, Caroline, Jeremy
First - This article by an IMB missionary is the best thing I have read this week. A very funny graph about cereal
A look at all the ways we could all die
Ryan showed me this link earlier. it is awesome. Just add http://bacolicio.us to any url and make the site more delicious. Try this